Sunday, September 14, 2008
I am a person who loves routine. The problem I find myself having is that I constantly am thinking, "When this is done we will get back to our routine." I am always wishing away our time for the sake of things getting back to normal. Though I wish we were not in the situation we are in right now, I am feeling the need to get on with life. I think my trouble in doing this is somehow wrapped up in my inability to give all of this stress to God. When I look back over the last several years there is always something. I am coming to the reality that I am wasting mine and my children's lives waiting for things to "return to normal." My oldest is struggling with something right now. It is pretty serious and we are losing a lot of sleep. I am home from church because he was a wake until 2 am with insomnia. He could not shake all of the thoughts going through his head. My prayer for him is that he would see the beauty in the life God has given him, give his anxiety over, and move on. As I prayed this over him in the middle of the night I immediately realized what a horrible example I have been to him. Could his anxiety stem from watching me deal with the stress in our life? So, my prayer for myself is the same as mine for him. I need to realize we live in a fallen world, which means there is always going to be stress and heartache. I need to give mine to God and get back to our "routine" even in the midst of trials. I have to stop waiting for everything to "get back to normal." This is the normal God has given us for now. So, my goal for each day is to seek God's help in not living in fear of what may happen in the next few months, but instead be thankful for what I have that day and continue in our routines.
Posted by Julie at 5:31 AM