Sunday, September 14, 2008

Routine

I am a person who loves routine. The problem I find myself having is that I constantly am thinking, "When this is done we will get back to our routine." I am always wishing away our time for the sake of things getting back to normal. Though I wish we were not in the situation we are in right now, I am feeling the need to get on with life. I think my trouble in doing this is somehow wrapped up in my inability to give all of this stress to God. When I look back over the last several years there is always something. I am coming to the reality that I am wasting mine and my children's lives waiting for things to "return to normal." My oldest is struggling with something right now. It is pretty serious and we are losing a lot of sleep. I am home from church because he was a wake until 2 am with insomnia. He could not shake all of the thoughts going through his head. My prayer for him is that he would see the beauty in the life God has given him, give his anxiety over, and move on. As I prayed this over him in the middle of the night I immediately realized what a horrible example I have been to him. Could his anxiety stem from watching me deal with the stress in our life? So, my prayer for myself is the same as mine for him. I need to realize we live in a fallen world, which means there is always going to be stress and heartache. I need to give mine to God and get back to our "routine" even in the midst of trials. I have to stop waiting for everything to "get back to normal." This is the normal God has given us for now. So, my goal for each day is to seek God's help in not living in fear of what may happen in the next few months, but instead be thankful for what I have that day and continue in our routines.

4 comments:

Anne said...

When I was a new wife and complaining to my mom about my husband's unpredictable flight schedule, I told her that I just couldn't wait for us to get a "normal" schedule. She wisely told me, "Anne, this is normal for you."

I can really understand how you're feeling, though, because I, too, prefer a routine, and I find myself wishing for "normal" far too often, especially this year. Your post is a reminder to me that THIS time has been appointed to me, and not for simply enduring until something else comes along.

(And I can relate to feeling like I've been a horrible example to my children, too!)

Praying for you and your family! May you glorify God and rest in Him in this new "normal".

Julie said...

Thank you Anne. We are praying for you as well.

Beth said...

Julie,

I can so appreciate the honesty and reality of your post. Just today I was thinking how much time I spend "doing" and not "being". When I am "being", I struggle to mentally not think about the "list" that has one more thing to check off or the latest "worry" that is one the list as well. :-)

Thank you for your encouraging post. My son is going to be doing Math with dad now at night if he does not complete it during his "time".

I read the earlier post and can't help but think how neat it must be teaching those students. I can only imagine what you must be soaking in right now! Are you making any notes that you would use again? When we went through that time period I remember feeling like I knew so much at the end of the year that I wish I could have known before...but that is okay. I loved MARR.

Well I think I wrote more than a comment! LOL

Have a good night.

Beth

Beth said...

Loved Anne's encouraging post .... Being content with "normal" whatever that may be.


:-)